


all I need is to be struck by your electric love

by taureel



Category: The Flash (TV 2014), The Flash - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Gen, and tons of secret identity shenanigans, especially ones built on angst and banter, superhero/villain relationships are my favorite wrong
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-12
Updated: 2017-04-28
Packaged: 2018-05-01 07:10:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5196869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/taureel/pseuds/taureel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Have I ever told you just how much I love that giggle?”</p><p>Iris froze inside the entrance of the safe, the familiar feeling of anger and excitement washing over her at hearing that sound.</p><p>“Have I ever told you just how much I hate your everything?”</p><p>(or the BatCat AU)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Her hands were as steady as her breath as she slowly moved the dial to the left, the soft clicking the only noise her ears could pick up. The Kaliinar diamond hidden inside that safe was worth 8 million dollars at auction and Iris couldn’t even begin to imagine what something as valuable as that would be worth on the black market.

This one was going to make a difference.

She couldn’t help the laugh that came out when the safe finally popped open. Time was finally on her side tonight.

“Have I ever told you just how much I love that giggle?” A distorted voice asked her from behind.

Iris froze inside the entrance of the safe, the familiar feeling of anger and excitement washing over her at hearing that sound.

“Have I ever told you just how much I hate your everything?” She dropped her hands to her side as she turned around to face the infamous red speedster, her frustration lacing her tone even through her speech muffler.

She could see the smirk playing on his face in the dark of the night, his mouth was one of the few things his costume didn’t cover and she liked to tell him it was because there wasn’t enough fabric in the world to cover a mouth as big and as stupid as his… okay, so she was never the most rational or witty when being pulled away in handcuffs.

She saw a flash of light and felt the familiar loss of breath that always accompanied his presence before finding herself outside the very same museum she had spent the past hour breaking into. The Flash was casually leaning on the light post in front of her and Iris took a deep breath to control her anger. Infamous cat burglars did not stomp their feet when they didn’t get their way or their diamond. They took out their anger on stupid, tights-wearing superheroes instead.

“Do you have any idea how long it took me to get into that safe? Oh, wait no, of course you don’t because you’re Mister Speed and you could probably fast forward through your shits if you really wanted to!” 

His shoulders were shaking when she finally stopped shouting and if she didn’t have a problem controlling her anger before, well then nothing could stop her now because if there was one thing she hated most in the world, it was people who didn't take her seriously. 

“Listen, you–” The air (and the very atoms that she could forget made up everything in her existence until she stood in front him again and again) moved and she felt a pair of handcuffs lock around her left wrist and then the iron railing at her side. He stood behind her now and she could feel the warmth of his breath on her neck, the low neckline was something she chose for aesthetic purposes instead of for any real functionality and she was beginning to regret her costume choices. She was really beginning to regret a lot of things. 

“Lucky for you, today’s been a slow day so you get to have me as company while we wait for Central City’s finest to respond to the alarm I set off leaving the museum. That was some great work you did on the system by the way, I think it might be your finest to date.”

She was counting the seconds in her head, her breaths acting as a metronome to the time she was trying to keep, “Yeah, well you’re a show off and your day’s about to go a lot faster.” 

She felt his breath stop, her words connecting in his mind, right before a loud explosion was set off a few blocks in front of them. As the city erupted in screams, they watched as shards of ice slinked up the building in front of them, the infrastructure creaking and groaning with every passing second.

“You might want to check that out,” Iris couldn’t help the smirk on her face as he cursed before running off, her hair angrily whipping around her face. 

She knew she would only have a few moments to make her escape before either the police or the Flash came back for her, not nearly enough time to make her way back inside the museum or the safe she knew was closed once again.

With one final stomp of her foot at a perfect heist gone wrong, she reached inside the wrist of her cat suit for the lock picks she kept hidden. 

 

—

 

_Suffice to say, cat burgling was never in her list of careers growing up._

_No, like most kids she wanted to grow up to be an actress or a princess or, hell, even a cupcake chef. But growing up with a junkie mom in the worst part of Gotham was enough to clear foolish thoughts like that from her head at an early age._  

 _It’s hard to be a kid when you’re cleaning vomit off the floor after your mother’s latest bender. It’s hard to be a kid when you’re waking up at four in the morning to make a bottle for your little brother because his hungry cries woke you up when his own mother’s dead to the world. It’s hard to be a kid in a world where children spend more time listening to the sound of gunshots than they do to Sesame Street, where playing ball outside comes with the added danger of being caught in the crossfires of another gang war, where kids don’t survive if they don’t grow up and they don’t learn._  

_Iris learned. Iris survived._

_She learned how to cook nutritious meals with the small amount of food their food stamps bought them, her skills growing out of necessity. She learned how to hide candy bars inside her long sleeves to surprise Wally with, to see him smile without a care in the world as she pretended she actually bought it this time. She learned where to dispose of needles and empty bags safely so her little brother wouldn’t get hurt and the social worker who came to see them wouldn’t get suspicious._  

_She learned that the only person she could trust in this world was herself, not the diseased city, not the harassed teachers, not her empty mother, and not her busy father._

_The father who was too busy saving Central City to save her. Who was too busy thinking about the past and his losses to think about her. The father who chose to foster another child who lost his parents when he wouldn’t even fight for her custody, who chose someone else every time instead of her._  

_She would waste so many hours as a child wondering why she wasn’t good enough for her dad to visit, why she wasn’t good enough for her mom to choose over her mind numbing drugs, why she wasn’t good enough for anyone to care about her. She would spend the monthly visits to Central City keeping to herself at first, letting Wally pretend for a weekend that they had a dad, while she left to explore a city that didn’t reek of death. If her dad wanted to complain about how young she was or worry about her safety, well, he lost that right a long time ago in her eyes._

_Central City was amazing to her back then. The people smiled as they walked down the street, the homeless didn’t try to grab you from dark corners, and there was so much green that Iris had to wonder where all those trees even came from and how they could survive with skyscrapers so tall surrounding them. She left the city every time knowing that it was where she belonged, that once Wally was old enough to leave their mother, this city was where she was going to take them._

_If she had to deal with a forgetful father and his quiet honorary son while living there then she was willing to make the sacrifice, no matter how much it pained her to be around them. And if, in the meantime, she had to steal, to weasel money out of the pompous rich aristocrats of Gotham, to pick locks and safes in between studying for her exams, then it was just another thing she did to survive._  

 _And Iris always survived._  

 

—

 

The morning was cold and quiet, most of the city still asleep even as the sun started to peek through the clouds. There were quite a few things Iris liked about her job, the people and the atmosphere of truth and of knowledge that permeated the place, but if there was one thing she could live without, it would be the early wake up calls. Being a lowly intern at a newspaper and tasked with getting the coffee and breakfast bar set up at the office every morning was just really not conductive to the lifestyle of a secret thief. Even one whose work was as sporadic as hers was.

She didn’t steal for herself and she only ever took from those who wouldn’t miss it, whose cushy bank accounts and insurance policies were equipped for the meddling of people like her. Iris realized her first week in Central City that hidden behind the clean image it presented, it was still a city of disparity between the wealthy and the poor. That what her young and hopeful eyes failed to see were the very real problems that plagued it, that the understaffed police force could never hope to completely eliminate, that the superhero defending the city couldn’t fix because there were bigger and more immediate problems that demanded his time. 

After editing an article for Mason about the tax cuts to the city’s foster system and the hundreds of kids that would be negatively affected by the Mayor’s decision to put more money in their tourism than in their public sector and then seeing that article end up lost in the pages of Central City Picture News as the Flash’s latest battle took precedent once again, Iris knew she had to do something.

Her talents were too good to be wasted and maybe they weren’t a necessity for her or her brother anymore, but it didn’t mean they wouldn’t be useful for someone else out there. When she was in a good mood, she liked to think of herself as a modern day Robin Hood stealing from the rich and giving to the poor, although without the bow and arrow or green tights (that costume was thankfully already taken by someone with much greyer morals than even herself). 

When she was in a bad mood, like today, she liked to think of herself as the only person in this world who actually gave a damn about something, _anything_.

The ringing of her cellphone brought her out of her thoughts and she slowed down as she saw who was calling. It was a surprise it took her so long, really.

“Hey Caitlin!” Iris made sure she put as much honey into her voice as she could, the same tone that got her out of so much trouble growing up.

“Oh, it’s not Caitlin talking to you today, it’s Killer Frost and she’s pissed.” 

“You know it’s weird when you talk in the third person, we’ve been over this.” 

“Hey, you don’t get to talk about what we’ve been over because if I remember right we also had this very specific plan that we went over for yesterday that you completely screwed over!” Oh, she was pissed. Iris could almost feel her cell phone getting colder by the second. 

“Hey, I’m sorry! He showed up as soon as I opened the safe and I don’t even know how he knew we were there. It must have been... a particularly slow night for crime fighting?” 

Iris could practically see the eye roll Caitlin was giving her and she felt the familiar guilt settle in her stomach. Fighting the Flash was always particularly hard on Caitlin, she exerted a lot of energy in trying to slow him down and it always left her with a terrible headache the day after. 

With a sigh, Iris leant against the bookstore to her right and prepared to grovel. “Caitlin, I’m really sorry. You know I want that diamond just as badly as you do for your dastardly Supervillain plans of mayhem and massive destruction, but I promise I’ll figure out a way to break in again. Their security is going to be better and I’m sure the Dumbest Man Alive will be waiting for us to come back, but I’ll come up with something, you know I always do.”

There was a pause on the other end before Caitlin sighed, “Fine. Do it fast.” 

The line went dead and Iris could only shake her head as she entered Jitters, it was really hard being friends with a sociopathic ice lady who spent half her time deciding whether or not she wanted to let you live that day or use you as a temporary personal heater. 

Her mind started to race, she’d have to find a way to go back to the museum and look at their security upgrades, maybe even convince Mason to let her write about the break-in last night while he tackled the more prominent Killer Frost story. It was just always weird writing about herself, especially when she had to pretend she didn’t agree with what she was doing or worse when she had to use that terrible alter ego the city gave her. 

Whoever gave her the name Black Cat was going to regret ever learning how to speak English if she found them. 

The bell hanging on the door chimed behind her as she waited in the small line that had already formed and Iris felt the cold morning air bite the back of her neck before someone came to stand behind her, their figure tall and lean at her back.

“Good morning, Iris.” She heard his distinctive tenor say behind her and she felt her stomach begin to knot itself as the familiar feeling of breathlessness and sharp emotion that always accompanied his presence overwhelmed her.

“Good morning, Barry.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh yeah, I'm doing this. This story was originally going to be my Big Bang entry for the Flash, but I didn't have the time so I've broken it down into a multichapter fic. I make no promises about consistent uploading, but I love this little AU world I've created so expect another update soon!
> 
> (will I ever have a Flash fic without some kind of lightning/electricity pun in the title? the answer is no, no I will not)
> 
> (and "Electric Love" by BØRNS is so a Westallen song)


	2. Chapter 2

_The sun’s rays were hot and relentless as they bore down on the back of her neck, the skin of it prickling with heat. Iris didn’t normally like interrupting Wally when he played in the backyard of their dad’s house, it was the one time a month he could be outside without the feeling of fear that being in Gotham choked them with, but they had been out there for so long (she was trying to make her dad feel ignored, she wanted him to feel like she did, she hoped he did) that Iris could feel exhaustion start to seep into her bones._

_She stood to walk towards the porch, promising she’d bring back something for them to drink when Wally looked up from his trucks to see what she was doing (“Yes, I pinky promise I’ll look for some juice boxes while I’m in there, now let go of my leg before I trip! Wally!”). Her father was terrible at keeping things stocked, his kitchen as neglected as his home usually was, and Iris had no doubt that she would have to scavenge for a good few minutes to find any kind of juice to satisfy Wally with. They could always walk to the corner store to pick something up if her search failed; they would just have to sneak through the backyard when they left. It was much easier scaling fences than having to explain to Joe why she didn’t want Barry to tag along with them._

_She didn’t need to be around perfect Barry Allen with his forced smiles and ridiculous intelligence. She didn’t need to be around the reminder that her dad could raise a child by himself just as long as that child wasn’t her._

_Her steps slowed as she reached the porch door, her fingers hovering over the sliding glass door that separated her from the kitchen. Barry was standing in front of her, his back facing her, the lines of his body strung tight with tension and anger. The hand that wasn’t held in a bloodless fist by his side was being pointed at her father and she could hear his voice breaking as he shouted._

_“I can visit him whenever I want to, he’s my father! I live under your roof and I’ll follow your rules, but you’re not my dad! You can’t keep me away from him any more, you can’t keep me away from my only family! I need my family… I’m not you, Joe.”_  

_His shouting was softer as he finished the last sentence and Iris couldn’t tell if it was because he was actually calming down or if the frantic thudding of her heart was starting to drown him out. She could see the exact moment his words registered to her father, Joe’s face slackening before he looked up to see Iris standing behind Barry._

_Iris couldn’t look away, she could only hear Barry’s voice ringing again and again in her mind. This was the first time anyone had told Joe he was the one who abandoned his family, the first time she had ever seen someone blame him like they loved to blame her mother. Iris could never ruin the fragile bond between her father and her little brother by voicing her anger and her hurt, she spent her time around them thinking of all the things she wanted to say and she kept it all inside as her thoughts scraped her insides raw._  

 _Her problems were her problems and no one else needed to know._  

 _Except, Barry knew. She’d never spoken more than three words to him in all the time they’d known each other and yet it felt like he’d grasped inside her head and pulled out her very thoughts to throw back at her father._  

 _Her dad looked away first, his jaw clenched tight for a few seconds before he gave a small nod and walked away towards the living room. She saw Barry slump as soon as his back was turned, the fight leaving him as fast as it had seemed to grab on. He started to turn before she could move, to make it look like she wasn’t eavesdropping, like she wasn’t stuck there frozen in her astonishment, like she didn’t actually care what happened inside this house that wasn’t home._  

_Her feet wouldn’t listen to her and Iris caught herself stuck in a second staring match, the face in front of her as surprised as she felt. A flush of pink worked its way up his neck and Iris found herself fascinated by its gradual journey to his cheeks. He was still so much shorter than her, but Iris felt like the smaller one as she looked at the sad boy in front of her. The same person she’d spent a year blaming and hating and being so damn envious of._

_The one person who looked as broken in this moment as she always felt._  

 _The sound of Wally calling her name finally broke the strange trance she was in and she turned to make sure her brother was okay. When she looked back inside the house, Barry was gone and the kitchen was empty once again._  

 

—

 

Iris could feel her heartbeat quicken and hoped the smile she was giving him as she turned around wasn’t as manic as she felt it was. Every time she was around Barry Allen, she’d leave the encounter feeling like her world was turned over, like she’d put on glasses and the world was suddenly the way it was always supposed to look – sharp and in focus. She was never ready for them, but she selfishly hoarded every meeting and every second anyway.

His hair was messier than normal and there were smudges of blue underneath his eyes that signaled his lack of sleep. Iris felt a stab of guilt at the thought that it was her actions and her plan that created so much work for him and that left him looking so tired. She wished his job didn’t have to revolve around her secret life so much. 

He started to yawn around the smile he was giving her, his hand going up to cover his mouth before moving up to ruffle his hair. 

Her fingers itched to fix the mess he made (to make it even messier, if he let her, if she had the courage) and she fell to her safety of rambling to calm her racing thoughts, “Had a rough night, huh? I know how those go, you know with the whole investigative journalist thing, I mean I’ve lost count of how many stakeouts I’ve done now and I don’t even get overtime like you guys do in the police force. Not that you don’t deserve your overtime, your job is very stressful, I mean just look at you! Wait, I didn’t mean—” 

Iris cut herself off as Barry’s smile started to grow even wider, where was her sociopathic friend when she actually needed someone to kill her? 

He dropped his head and shook it before looking back up at her through his lashes, the look on his eyes a mixture of amusement and something warmer, something that caused her to take a step back before she could help herself. 

His amusement colored his tone as he explained, “There was a double whammy attack last night with Black Cat hitting the Central City Museum of Art and Killer Frost attempting to rob a nearby bank. All our time was spent on the bank and the Killer Frost investigation and we still have to check the museum for any clues today. As if we’ll find anything anyway, Black Cat is like a ghost when she’s working.” 

Iris felt a burst of pride at the begrudging admiration in his voice before she managed to school her expression into one of appropriate concern. Oh yeah, bad girls do it well. She really needed to stop putting Rihanna on her breaking and entering playlist. 

“That’s horrible, I’m so sorry! Mason’s going to love this though, he’s probably been at the Killer Frost scene this whole night. Hey, maybe I can come to the museum to get something on Black Cat? It’ll be an interesting story, I mean what could she have been trying to steal this time?”

 “You’re just her biggest fan, aren’t you?” he replied as he gave her an exasperated look.

Iris knew she had to exercise extra caution when dealing with Barry, he seemed to pick up on things about her that she never even knew she was broadcasting, his reading of her thoughts so scarily accurate she wouldn’t be surprised if he admitted to being a mind reading metahuman in the future. 

Oh, she really hoped he couldn’t read minds.

“Well, I just can’t help, but admire any woman out there making a name for herself in a man’s world.”

The incredulous scoff he gave at that was enough to make Iris burst out laughing, her nose crinkling as she gave up trying to keep a straight face. 

“Excuse me, ma’am? It’s your turn.” 

She turned around to place her order, a smile still playing on her lips and went to wait for her extra-sugary, extra-caffeinated monstrosity as Wally liked to call them. 

Barry walked up to her a few minutes later, a large cup of black coffee already in his hand, his steps steady so he didn’t spill any of the hot liquid over the side. Iris was already preparing herself for any hot beverage emergencies being in his proximity.

“So, I guess I can let you shadow me while I work today, out of the kindness of my heart of course.” 

His smile was smug and Iris rolled her eyes before as she went to take her drink from the barista, “I can sneak past that flimsy yellow tape with or without your help, Barry. Please don’t feel obligated or anything, you most selfless of beings.” 

“Hey, I hope you know that’s illegal! Freedom of speech doesn’t protect you from getting arrested, you know.” He was still smiling, but Iris sensed the seriousness in what he was saying.

She felt her mouth go dry at the hidden meaning he didn’t even know his words conveyed and started to walk backwards as she talked, doing her best to seem like she wasn’t running away. 

“Yeah, well I’ll see you at the precinct later. That is, if I don’t decide to ditch you anyway!” 

When she walked in the doors to Central City Picture News a few moments later, she could almost make herself believe her stuttering breaths were from the exertion of walking to work instead of the steady feeling of her identities pressing down on her.

 

—

 

After a hectic morning of fetching, filing, and groveling at the feet of the Editor-in-chief to let her write the piece about Black Cat, she was more than ready to escape to the outside world. One of her favorite things about journalism was that she could leave whenever she wanted, that she could write wherever she wanted, and that she had a desk and chair, but she was never tied down to it. She craved her freedom too much to let that happen.

Iris made her way through the police precinct, most of the cops waving to her as she made a beeline for the garage and lot in the back. With a head detective for a father and a police mechanic for a brother, her face was an easily recognized and loved one here.

Sometimes, she liked to imagine people’s reactions if they ever managed to catch her, just how would they all react knowing that the infamous Black Cat was actually the daughter of one of their most respected detectives. Her father would be angry, he would be disappointed, and she hoped, more than anything, that he felt guilty. That he looked at her and saw his failures like she saw her own whenever she looked at him. If anything, it would make him notice her more.

Wally would be disappointed, too. Not because of what she was doing, but that she managed to get caught. He would spend the rest of her jail sentence visiting her and telling her just how embarrassing it was to have his sister be so bad at the whole villainous thing. He would also probably end up getting kicked out of the prison for trying to bring her a cake with a nail file baked into it. He had just the right amount of confidence and terrible sense of humor for a stunt like that.

And Barry… she didn’t really know how he would react. Iris didn’t like to think about what it would be like for him to have two people he knew in prison. Not that she was nearly as important to him as his own dad, no she was just the daughter of the guy who raised him, who he grew up seeing once a month for years and is now forced to share a city with. She knew Barry liked her because Barry liked everyone, but Iris wasn’t nearly egotistical enough to imagine herself as someone significant in Barry’s life or heart.

Still, she liked to daydream that he would be one of her visitors if she were ever caught, his anger at her eventually mixing with his admiration of her skills. If anything could take away from the monotony of jail, it would be visits from her favorite science geek.

“Either the bakery next door is having a half off sale on brownies or you’re thinking about a certain science geek. Hmm, you know what? I’m going to with science geek for 500, Alex!” 

Iris jumped at the voice by her ear as she walked through the door to the garage and turned to see Wally wiping his hands on a rag while waggling his eyebrows suggestively at her.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Wallace Rudolph.” She replied primly.

His face contorted into a disgusted look and Iris had to duck as he threw the rag at her face, “Never call me that! That is not my name! I was born into a family with sane people who would never name their child after a damn reindeer.”

He stomped away muttering under his breath and Iris couldn’t help laughing as she followed him, “Yeah, well ‘Sane-Family-Wally’, I came to check up on you before going upstairs to see Barry. He’s going to let me shadow him at a crime scene later.” 

Wally stretched out a mechanic’s creeper before rolling under the beautiful, illegal drag racing car the precinct had impounded earlier that month. Iris was still recovering hearing in her left ear from his screams of joy the first time he laid eyes on it. 

“And this crime scene wouldn’t happen to be one of Black Cat’s, would it? A crime scene that will have no evidence, naturally, as you would know?”

Iris paused her examination of the multiple wrenches in front of her to look back at the car, “And just what would you be implying with that?” 

“Oh, nothing at all. I would just like to say that it was a really close call last night. I heard the boys talking about how they just barely missed her escape, that if she had been a little slower they would have finally gotten her.”

She was quiet as she listened to muffled noises coming from the beneath the car. They never talked about this outright. It was always hidden behind jokes and subtle comments about Black Cat’s actions.

The first time he brought it up, the question burning in his eyes even if he wouldn’t ask her it out loud, she wasn’t surprised at all. If anyone knew about her skills and her abilities, it was the person who grew up watching her use them everyday. It was the very person she honed those skills for.

“They haven’t caught her, yet and they’d be lucky if they ever could.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t know why she keeps doing it anyway. Her heists have been slowly dwindling in numbers and Central City is a changed place now between the Flash and you. Your words and your truth are stronger than any money out there in the black market.” The garage was completely silent now and Iris could hear just how hard he was trying to keep his tone light.

“And yet, money still speaks in this city, doesn’t it? I have to find Barry before he leaves without me.” She turned towards the exit, pausing at the doorway when Wally sighed. 

“Just be careful, Iris.”

“I’ll see you at dinner tonight. I’ll make your favorite, okay?” 

If her voice was thicker than normal, then it was something they would both ignore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was really worried about uploading with this story because I'd never faced the commitment of a multichaptered story before, but your response last time was so overwhelming that I couldn't help, but get this out as soon as I was done! I have a specific plan for the story so it's only about finding the time to write and I hope I can upload often since I really want the whole work to be out there already (I'm not patient enough for this style of writing obviously).
> 
> In the comics, Wally is a mechanic for the KCPD so I just transitioned that over to Central City because I need my lovable goofball around to help balance Iris' enviable angst.
> 
> next chapter: crime scene shenanigans and Iris has a plan...


	3. Chapter 3

The familiar sound of beeping and groaning from the giant mass spectrometer greeted her as she walked into the wide and airy space above the precinct. Iris always found it fitting that a scientist like Barry would have a lab that was just as unique and nontraditional as he was, the large windows and wooden interior creating a cozier room than any laboratory she’d ever seen before.

Movement at the edge of her vision caught her attention and she turned just in time to see Patty rise from behind the table to her left, her blonde hair pulled back in a ponytail and an excited smile playing on her lips.

“Hey, Patty, what has you so happy this early in the day?” Iris could feel a smile pulling on her lips as the brainy scientist jumped before looking over at her.

“Iris! Oh, I was just examining the ice that Barry collected from the second crime scene last night. You know how snowflakes are all unique and that the specific conditions and locations they’re formed in determine the shapes that they make?” She didn’t wait for an answer before continuing, “Well, the ice crystals that Killer Frost releases are all so identical that they’re basically carbon copies of each other, it’s so unnatural!”

Iris filed that piece of information away to mention to Caitlin next time she saw her, she would either get an interesting remark on the science behind her powers or a disparaging remark on her intelligence depending on the ice queen’s mood that day. 

“Why are you examining her ice? I can’t imagine that the district attorney needs forensic proof that it was Killer Frost who attacked last night.”

Patty set her test tube down before raising a hand to her ponytail, “Well, Barry thinks we can discover something about her powers and possible weaknesses if we keep examining the molecular structure of her ice. There may be faults in them that we can exploit. Guns don’t really work against, well you know, people like that, but science just might.”

“Oh.” She could feel a bit of trepidation settle in her chest as she took in the meaning of Patty’s words, there was fear for Caitlin if Barry did discover something from his research (for as much as she liked to joke, Barry honestly was one the smartest people she had ever met, one of those genius-types that only came around every so often) and there was also fear for Barry for getting himself mixed up in the affairs of metahumans like this. She wished she could go up to him and shake him, remind him that he was just human and that he couldn’t make enemies out of the gods that walked amongst them, that he could break just like the rest of them and his precious science couldn’t protect him then. 

She cleared her throat before continuing, hoping to get rid of any of the obvious emotion in her voice, “Speaking of Barry, have you seen him? He promised me a crime scene today.” 

Patty stilled, her hand dropping from her hair and a strange expression flitting upon her face. Iris didn’t have time to wonder what could have caused her obvious discomfort before she heard the sound of footsteps behind her, her question caught in her throat. 

“Hey, there you are! Ready to go?” 

The awkward silence that met him caused his next words to come out stilted in their confusion, “Uh, are you guys okay?” 

Iris tore her gaze from Patty and her awkward attempts of avoiding eye contact by examining the test tube in front of her. She stopped as she turned to face Barry, noticing how close he was standing, how she’d barely have to take a step forward to brush her nose against the collarbone peeking out of his flannel.

“Yeah, yeah, we’re fine.”

 

—

 

Watching herself on security tapes was always a weird experience, having both the physical first hand knowledge of what she was doing in them, while also being able to examine her technique as an outsider. She watched entranced as the lithe figure in skintight leather made her way around the laser beams, her confidence and strength apparent even in the pixelated, black and white video of the museum’s cameras.

“She’s getting better at this,” Barry muttered by her ear.

Iris could feel Barry at her back again, one hand on her chair and the other on the computer table in front of them. His face held a look of intense concentration as he watched the cat burglar (her) make her way to the security panel hidden behind one of the priceless vases on the floor. She could feel her face get hot as he scrutinized the image, wondering just what he was so focused on.

“Yeah,” the large security guard next to her chuckled, “this is the first time she’s targeted the museum in a while. Man, she has to be a metahuman with how easily she can pick those locks and disable these systems. Probably something to do with metal, if I had to guess.”

“No, she’s human. Just human.” Barry muttered, still fixated on the screen in front of them.

Iris turned to look at him quizzically, “And just how do you know that?” 

His gaze faltered, his eyes darting towards her and then back to the screen. She could see a wrinkle appear between his brows as he hesitated in his answer.

“There are, um, microtachyon particles that all metahumans give off that I swipe for at crime scenes and she doesn’t emit any so logically, she can’t possibly be a metahuman. I mean I’ve never met her or fought her… of course I haven’t fought her! But, uh, the science speaks for itself, you know?” 

Iris could feel her puzzlement grow at his strange explanation, brows lowering as she processed that information. She wasn’t exactly a scientist like the majority of the people in her life, the only science class she could really handle was Psychology and that was more about reading people than it was reading obscure data, but she was pretty sure she’d heard talk about tachyons in the recent Star Trek movie that Wally and Barry had dragged her to and last time she checked there were absolutely no metahumans in it. 

“That doesn’t make se—”

“Oh look, she’s at the safe now!”

Iris turned quickly to look at the video, cataloguing Barry’s strange behavior as something to think about later when she had more focus and he wasn’t so close still. She heard him exhale in relief, the hands on the desk in front of her still rigid with tension.

This part of the video was the most important for her, if she could see exactly what they caught on film then she would have a better idea of how they were going to increase their security. Places that were targeted as frequently as the museum often took shortcuts like that in their defenses and, while it was never safe, Iris could see how upgrading all of your security every time that Captain Cold organized a prison break was just a little bit impractical. 

The cat burglar in front of her was still as a mouse as she listened to the dial turn and Iris felt a pang of remorse that all that careful hard work was going to go to waste in a scant few minutes when the red blunder would appear. There was movement at the edge of the video and Iris watched as the Flash suddenly appeared.

Wait, that wasn’t right. 

She was sure that he didn’t get there until she actually cracked the safe. There weren’t any movements, not even a whisper to suggest he was there until he made his barb about her laugh, and yet, there he stood his back to the column behind him and his arms crossed, as he did… nothing.

A frown pulled on her lips as the superhero continued to stand there. She had never actually seen him stand so still, didn’t even think it was possible for a being made of so much movement to suddenly just stop, to even be able to relax like he had. Iris knew her confusion was written on her face, that she wasn’t hiding anything very well right now, but she couldn’t reign in her emotions just yet, she couldn’t do much of anything, but stare just as seemingly entranced as the man in the video in front of her.

Why wasn’t he moving?

“Why’s the dude just standing there?” the confused security guard asked, his hands rising to check the screen to see if the video had frozen.

Barry was still staring transfixed at the video as he answered, “He’s probably watching her work, maybe looking for any clues into her process so he can stop her sooner next time,” he paused for a breath before his lips twitched into a smirk, “or maybe he’s just staring at her for the sake of it.”

Iris felt her cheeks heat up as she turned to glare at Barry, this situation was weird enough for her without all of his oblivious commentary. His next words, muttered so softly she didn’t think she was meant to hear them, stilled her.

“I’d stop, too, for a sight like her.”

If she thought she was blushing before, it was nothing compared to what she must look like currently.

The safe was cracked and Iris could see the flicker in her periphery as both figures disappeared from the screen, the recording now useless to their investigation. She couldn’t take her eyes off Barry, though, as he finally turned to see that both her and the security guard were staring at him with various levels of disbelief.

His eyes widened in surprise (whether at them or himself she had no idea) and before she could form her next question, he straightened up suddenly and turned towards the room where the rest of the crime scene was.

“What was that, you needed help collecting those microtachyon particles? I’ll be right there, Patty!”

He made a hasty retreat, barely stopping himself from running out of the room they were in. Iris stared as Patty gave Barry an incredulous look, her confusion evident in her face as he grabbed the camera from her hands and starting to take photos of the random outlet next to them, before the laugh at her back made her turn around.

“No wonder he knows so much about this stuff, his interest isn’t purely work related at all!”

The chuckling security guard was shaking his head as he turned to rewind the security recording and through her bemusement, Iris could feel her more scheming instincts kick in. 

He was off guard right now, an open book for all of her questions and she pushed all thoughts of Barry and his reactions and, most importantly, his reactions to her, out of her mind as she put on her sweetest smile.

“Speaking of interests that aren’t purely work related, how long will this new exhibit be in town? I really want to go see it, but I’m just so scared of someone attacking the museum again. It’s so scary when things like this happen!” Her eyes widened as she tried to look scared for the guard and she had to force down a smirk at his immediate reassurances of just how they were going to improve their security starting today.

She would feel bad about how easy it was to manipulate the guard, really, if it wasn’t his own fault for being naïve enough to discuss things like this with a known member of the press. 

Once the guard finished explaining all their upgrades and started going off on his tangent of just how he, personally, was going to stop all the attacks on the museum, she started to tune him out and turned to find Barry again. She wasn’t quite done with him, yet. 

Iris froze as she caught sight of Eddie, her father’s partner, talking to the curator of the exhibit. If he was here, then they must have finished whatever they were doing at the Killer Frost crime scene and that meant her father was probably somewhere as well. Normally she wouldn’t avoid Joe, she liked to think she had more pride than that at this point in her life, but Wally had been not very subtly hinting to her how she should invite Joe to their next dinner. Iris just knew that if she was face to face with Joe again, she would think of Wally, honest and happy Wally who loved their mother and their father with all his heart, who could never really understand why Iris was always closed off around their father, and she would cave and invite him regardless of how she felt.

She gathered her stuff as she left the security guard midsentence and kept to the wall as she made her way to the exit, keeping her head down and staying as inconspicuous as all the bodies around her.

“Iris! Wait up!” Iris would swear to the ends of the earth and back that Eddie had some strange homing beacon when it came to her and crime scenes. 

“Hi, Eddie, sorry I can’t really stay to talk right now, I’ve got to get back to work and start typing this article on the break in.” She was out the door before Eddie could get a word in edgewise and as she turned one last time to look at the building, she caught sight of Barry glancing away and smiling smugly down at his camera.

 

—

 

_Iris cursed as she stubbed her toe on the antique table in the hallway, she was still having trouble making her way around Joe’s house in the dark, but she was much too tired to put on any lights and ruin any chances she would have of falling asleep again. If she wasn’t always so thirsty in the drier climate of Central City, she wouldn’t have even bothered getting out of bed in the first place._

_Gotham wasn’t much, it really wasn’t much, but at least you didn’t have to fear ending up a mummy if you forgot to bring a water bottle with you while leaving the house._

_“That’s a really bad word.”_

_Iris caught herself mid-shriek as she turned to see Barry sitting on the couch in the dark living room, a glass of milk on the table in front of him._

_“What are you doing sitting in the dark like a weirdo? You could have given me a heart attack!” Iris knew she was over exaggerating it a little bit, but her heart was beating faster than a hummingbird’s and the small laugh Barry gave at her reaction wasn’t helping at all._

_“I couldn’t fall asleep,” he hesitated for a beat before continuing, “Nightmares.”_

_She knew about nightmares, hers usually always featured her mother or Wally (sometimes Joe if she read something scary in the Central City newspaper and she found herself worrying about him, and occasionally even the boy in front of her, but Iris didn’t care to think about what that meant) in terrible situation she couldn’t save them from. And she knew about his nightmares, too. Her room was right next to his and sometimes she would listen to him pace for hours around his room before she fell asleep, she tried to make it into a contest sometimes to see who could stay awake the longest, but he always beat her._

_“Oh.” Iris could have smacked herself at her stupid reply and she found herself hesitating in the hallway, “Have you told J—uh, my dad about them?”_

_Barry gave her a disbelieving look and Iris could feel her anger rise at the expression._  

_“Hey, he cares about you and obviously if you’re having problems or whatever then he can fix them or make them go away or whatever… he’s a cop, you know!” She didn’t know why she added that as an afterthought since Barry very clearly did know, but she always thought it was an important thing to mention when it came to her dad._

_This time Barry let out a bark of laughter at her words, “Oh that’s just rich coming from you, Iris.”_

_Iris was surprised that Barry would mention the elephant in the room that was her own behavior toward her father, she was getting better at not letting her anger show so much anymore because it made Wally happier to see her at least tolerate their monthly trips instead of being outright hostile. Maybe she wasn’t doing as great of a job at pretending as she thought._

_She could hear Barry sigh sadly and Iris watched him stare at the tightly clenched fists in his lap, “I’m sorry, I—I didn’t mean to say that. It’s just… he wouldn’t believe me, anyway. I just want him to believe me.”_

_“Believe you about what?” Iris whispered, realizing he wasn’t really talking about his nightmares anymore._

_Barry looked up again, a fierce resolve in his eyes as he tried to will her into trusting him, “My dad didn’t kill my mom.”_

_This was the first time they’d ever spoken about this, about the reason why he even came to live with Joe and why they even knew each other now. This was actually the first time they’d ever really spoken more than plain pleasantries to each other. She couldn’t help, but think that the dark helped their conversation. She always found it strangely hard to talk or even think when she could actually see him._

_“It was the man in the yellow suit who did it! That night there was all this wind and electricity and I know that sounds weird, but she was in the middle and she was scared and my dad he was trying to help her, not hurt her! It wasn’t him who killed her, it was the man in yellow. I know it wasn’t him, not my dad.”_

_His voice broke at the end of his tirade and Iris stared as the young boy in front of her started to frantically rub at his eyes, his breathing hard and ragged. She could feel her own hands shaking and she exhaled softly before speaking again._

_“I believe you, Barry.”_

_He froze before turning to look at her again, his eyes wide and disbelieving as they stared at her face, judging the honesty written on it. Iris felt vulnerable, she wanted to close off her expression and leave, but she knew this was important to him. It felt important to her, too._  

_“In Gotham, people are framed for things they didn’t do a lot. The cops aren’t always as nice as Joe, a lot of them are friends with the people they’re supposed to be arresting, actually. It would be funny if it wasn’t so sad,” this time Iris looked away first, “Weird things happen there, too. Some people can do things that they shouldn’t be able to normally, I think. So… I believe you, I really do.”_

_Iris was still staring at her sock clad feet, her toes wriggling in the soft carpet at the edge of the hallway and living room. Barry didn’t say anything immediately and she didn’t think she really wanted to hear what he wanted to say, anyway. This night was weird and she just wanted to go back to sleep and forget about all of it._  

_She turned back towards the stairs, her original objective of coming down here long forgotten. Her hand was on the railing before she paused at the sound of the softly whispered words behind her. She didn’t think she had ever heard Barry sound so calm before._

_“Thank you, Iris.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't help, but make Patty a forensic scientist like she is in the comics because that's my favorite Patty. I do really like how they handled her attitude towards metahumans (even if I didn't really like how they handled much of the beginning of season 2 at all) and I wanted to keep that part of her characterization for the story because I think it adds a lot of nice tension.
> 
> Sorry for the delay in updating! I just can't help it, I'm a terribly slow planner that writes in short bursts and then ignores something for weeks.
> 
> next chapter will have the museum break in (part deux!) which means flash/black cat shenanigans and another character cameo from the show...


	4. Chapter 4

Iris would give up the Kaliinar diamond itself if she never had to see another laser protected hallway again. The door to the exhibit was hidden behind intricately laid out red beams of light. Every single one was sensitive to either touch or heat, a necessary extra requirement in a city where not all people had both characteristics at one time.

The sound of shuffling behind her gave her pause and she turned to see Caitlin walk out of the other room while brushing small pieces of the (very much destroyed) more advanced security system off her shoulder.

“Ugh, what is with this city and its clichés?” the villainess scoffed as her eyes focused on the scene before him.

“I’m starting to think we’re all stuck in this paradox where our popular culture influences our actual super lives which then inspires more exaggerated comics about us and we’re all just stuck in this infinite loop of clichés and bad costumes.”

“Speak for yourself, honey, my costume is both functional and looks amazing.”

Iris could feel a smirk tug on her lips and she launched into a forward handspring as soon as the next sentence left her mouth, “Please, you look like you ransacked a Hot Topic the day the particle accelerator exploded.”

The angry shout behind her was enough to keep her momentum going, the knowledge of an angry, sociopathic metahuman at her back more than adequate motivation to get her across the hallway and to the little button tucked underneath the water fountain. She’d be sure to send the security guard flowers tomorrow as a thank you gift for that knowledge.

The system proceeded through a round of beeps before a hiss escaped from the vents and Iris released a breath as the lasers disappeared and she could finally unbend. Her relief was shortsighted as an icicle was rammed into the wall a centimeter next to her face. She turned, shocked to see a still fuming Caitlin stomping away from her and towards the safe, before collapsing into laughter.

“Oh, come on! It was funny!”

Caitlin continued to glare at her and Iris finally picked herself off the floor at the sight, a smile still firmly in place. She didn’t know what Caitlin was like before Killer Frost, but she knew that lack of humor couldn’t have been a new development at all for her. She was just one of those people who were born serious and lived very grave, important lives. Well, until life literally made them an ice queen, anyway. 

“Just open the safe, already! You’re a thief, not a comedian, idiot.” Caitlin huffed when Iris reached her. 

Iris was about to retort before stumbling to a halt – a familiar, masked face staring them down in front of the safe once again. 

“I, for one, support any lifestyle changes you rogues make towards becoming functioning members of our society. When’s your first show, Black Cat?” 

“Dude, that would be awesome! Your humor would obviously be one of the dryer, slice of life routines, you know, more Tina Fey or Chelsea Handler than Sarah Silverman. Although, I could see you being one of those shtick comedians for the money like that one puppet guy, oh wait, do you even like puppets?” 

She couldn’t help the exasperated groan that escaped her as Vibe appeared behind them, the two superheroes effectively trapping them in the hallway. Caitlin tensed next to her, her back ramrod straight as she stared down the Flash. She didn’t turn or acknowledge the other superhero, but Iris knew instinctively what would happen next. 

There was a reason Killer Frost never outright fought Vibe and as much as Caitlin joked that it was because he wasn’t a serious enough opponent, Iris knew there was more to it. Even if she didn’t know what _it_ actually was. 

She sprang towards Vibe the moment Caitlin destroyed the wall the Flash was formerly in front of and, with a quick last minute dive out of the way of his sonic blast, she found herself underneath a very familiar water fountain.

“No, I hate puppets, they give me the creeps” she finally retorted as the vents hissed and the intricate webbing of laser beams appeared again. 

Vibe froze as the hallway became illuminated again and she could see him staring intently at their hidden sources, probably trying to figure out if these were the harmless alarm type of beams or the slice-a-person-like-butter beams. 

“I should have known. You seem like the type of person who would stick to their roots instead of selling out for fame. It’s the honest woman in you.” 

“Are you seriously calling the supervillain trying to kill you an ‘honest woman’, right now?” Iris remarked as she moved quickly through the beams towards him. She watched as he fumbled, awkward in his maneuvers. He was a long range fighter, someone whose moves were better in large spaces where he could twist and turn freely. She had him trapped currently and they both knew it. 

“Oh, you would never kill me, beneath your exterior of indifference lies a heart of gold. It’s why I thought Black Cat was such a fitting name for you.”

His focus was cut between her and the system around them, she could see the moment he figured out the exact type of beams they were trapped in, just a moment before he realized what he let slip. 

“You’re the one who gave me this stupid name?!” She took a misstep in her outrage and the alarms started blaring around them, the lights flashing as the gates by the door slammed down. 

Vibe chuckled nervously as a hand went to play with the hair he kept tied back in a half ponytail, “Guess the cat’s out of the bag, now? Heh, literally.” 

Iris reached for the metal rope in the container fastened to her hip, tightening her grip in anger.

“Will you stop it with the cat puns already?” She growled as he dodged her attack, his reflexes slower than normal and affected by the increase in stimuli around them. For someone as powerful as Vibe was when he decided to be serious, his heightened senses and powers came at the price of becoming overstimulated. It took a lot of effort on her part to always be equipped with flash grenades or weaponized noisemakers, but tonight the obnoxious alarm system the museum had installed was doing all the work for her.

She could tell she was getting close to him, the sonic waves he sent at her broader spaced and not as exact as normal. With a fast dodge, she went careening into a column, her side aching from the effort.

It wasn’t fair being human.

“Don’t you get sick of being the Flash’s sidekick all the time, sweetheart?” She mocked while trying to catch her breath, trying to bide her time. She could hear him panting on the other side, muttering numbers underneath his breath that suspiciously sounded like the digits of pi to stay focused.

“Hey, I’m no sidekick! I’m just helping out my friend,” Iris barely dodged out of the way as he sent another blast, this time he was the one advancing towards her, “I’ve got my own villains and double life to worry about, anyway. I even have my own flirty villain like he does, although she’s not nearly as nice as you are to the Flash.”

Iris let out an indignant huff before she could stop herself, his laughter at her reaction only making her angrier. The Flash and her were not _flirty_ , he was her archnemesis and that was it, no matter what the trash tabloid that was the Central City Enquirer speculated. 

“Oh yeah, and which villain is that exactly, the Golden Glider? Or is it my very own partner in crime? Killer Frost always has had a soft side for you.” 

He hesitated at her crueler words and Iris took the opening he gave her, closing the gap between them before kicking the goggles off his face. His disorientation increased as he fell to his knees and Iris had a moment to celebrate her triumph before the wall next to them exploded. 

With a body tackle towards Vibe, she moved them away from the cloud of debris that was kicked up. She turned away from his still figure when the dust settled and with a gasp, ran towards the prone figure clutching a diamond on the ground. 

“Killer Frost!” 

Iris dropped next to Caitlin, trying to shake her awake again. 

 _This was not part of the plan, this was not part of the plan, this was not…_

She noticed her mistake too late as the cold started to seep into her bones, the figure underneath suddenly awake. She must have lost her glove sometime in the fight with Vibe, the normally protective layer missing as she made skin to skin contact with the frozen hand underneath her. It was like touching a metal pole on a cold day, the bitter cold sticking you together until it felt your own skin would peel off if you tried to remove it. She felt her body heat lowering dangerously as Caitlin moved to grab her tighter, the manic look in her eyes getting wilder at the thought of more heat. 

“You’re so warm” she shuddered as she moved closer.

“Caitlin… stop, you’re—” her voice gave out as the edges of her vision began to blacken.

She thought of Caitlin coming out of her manic episode to see her frozen body next to her, she thought of Wally waiting for her at the bowling alley tomorrow and his pain when she wouldn’t show up, she thought of her mother clean for so long and her inevitable relapse if she ever died, she thought of Joe and his anger (maybe, maybe even his grief) when he found her body, and she… she thought of Barry…

 _Barry_.

“Get away from her!”

Her body spasmed as heat finally returned, the cold presence above her thrown to the side by a frantic burst of speed. She took large, heaving gasps as she watched the scene unfold in front of her. Caitlin disoriented, the manic look fading from her eyes as the Flash ran into her barrage of ice attacks. He had stopped dodging him, bursting through the ice flurries with speed she had never seen before. His corporeal body reduced to nothing but light and anger.

The gates at the doors behind rattled as the police finally made it to the scene, but the two metahumans in front of her didn’t spare them a second glance. The sirens wailed as more ice shattered on the floor, the light reflecting a rainbow of colors off them.

Iris felt herself start to fray, her body still in shock and so tired. She wasn’t going to be able to escape. Not this time. 

Her struggling eyes slid shut and the cacophony of sounds around her finally silenced.

 

—

 

_She was running._

_Her feet pounding on the pavement was the only sound in the decrepit alleyway, her short breaths coming in gasps as she sprinted to the small opening to her right, the entryway just big enough for her newly developing body to fit into._ _She put a hand to her mouth, to silence herself, her lungs aching as they begged for oxygen, for more than she could give as she begged herself to stay quiet._

_The loud footsteps that had been consistently shadowing her finally faded as the angry gang of boys ran past her hiding spot. Their loud jeers following them through Gotham._

_Iris waited with baited breath as silence surrounded her again._

_Those boys had been trying to actively recruit Wally for their gang, any dummy could see the value in having a whiz kid like him with them. A brain like his could be molded, shaped to cultivate the best skills for the worst jobs._

_They were going to get to her baby brother over her dead body._

_Iris had been subtly sabotaging their attempts to get near Wally, making sure to always steer him away if she saw anyone affiliated with the gang. She’d searched online for any information on keeping kids out of gangs and had signed him up for extracurricular activities at the community center near them (and reluctantly signed up herself, opting for the creative writing course instead of the small engines class he had excitedly signed onto)._ _Then, she’d called Joe when she found that strong male presences were a deterrent to rebellious behavior, had asked him for more visitation weekends._

 _Even now, she could recall the trembling of her fingers as she dialed his number, the cold fear seeded in her stomach as she talked to him. Fear of rejection (again), of some excuse about being too busy for her or Wally._

_Even now, she could feel the elation she felt at his agreement, the wonder at him saying it would be fine with him if they visited more. Her happiness at not being rejected by him before she stamped it out quickly, quietly. She couldn’t let herself hope like that, the very situation behind her asking for more visitation weekends a cold reminder of why people like her didn’t hope like that._

_But Wally could hope, he could play nerdy video games with Barry when they visited and watch basketball games on TV with their dad. And her mom could hope, she could pray that her daughter was finally letting go of her anger, that she hadn’t ruined a family in her desire to get away and get clean, in her selfish need keep Iris with her._

_They could all hope and Iris would keep making sure that they were able to, that they got the best they could out of this life. But, not her. Never her._

_Dreamers could only stay afloat if there were realists like her willing to drown for them._

_With a final shaky breath, she ran back the way she came, Gotham coming alive around her as she finally made it to the busy street._

 

—

 

“Wake up! Come on, wake up!”

She felt herself being shook, the hands at her shoulder urgent and holding her up to the hard, stone wall behind her back. The cool, night air bit at her face, but Iris still felt like she was being suffocated.

“Please, please just… just wake up,” the pleading the distant finally reached her and Iris wondered who cared so much to beg for her like this.

“S-stop shaking me,” she managed to croak out before having a coughing fit. The hands at her shoulders stilled before moving to her back, supporting her again.

When her lungs finally stopped seizing, Iris let her head fall back and eyes finally open. She was stunned to see the dark, starry sky laid out above her. She didn’t think she was ever going to see it again, not like this, unobstructed by a prison cell. In her shock, she recognized the red leather clad figure at her side, his face close to hers and his eyes still frantic as they searched her. She could see the skyline of Central City laid out in front of them and she knew they weren’t at the museum anymore, that they were on a rooftop far away.

He had moved her.

He _saved_ her.

The realization must have shown in her face, the crinkle setting between her brows, and she saw a shutter fall across his face as the situation hit them both. He opened his mouth, but no sound come out. She saw his mouth tremble, a non-vocal stutter.

Then, he stood back, impossibly fast and Iris felt the cold prick at her skin. She hadn’t realized he was still touching her, his body heat a comfort, something solid to ground her in the bizarre turn her life had taken.

“Don’t get used to this. You’re a villain and you've committed countless crimes,” his suddenly distorted voice was hard ( _before when he was begging her, when his voice lost that rough, vibrating quality, was that real, was that him?_ ), but his eyes avoided hers, “and if you hadn’t been hurt, if this whole thing hadn't been so fucked up and you'd just opened your eyes, I... I would have let the police arrest you.” 

She couldn’t move, her mind impossibly frozen on the man in front of her. Was this a side effect of Killer Frost’s touch, her inability to breathe or focus or think when she looked at him now? 

He turned, his back to her and she saw him stare out across the rooftop. She could feel the moment before he left, the air shifting around him.

“Wait, I—”

But she was too late and he was gone, a flash of yellow streaking between the buildings away from her. She didn't know what she was going to say, what she was going to ask him, all she knew was that he was leaving and she couldn't let that happen. Not yet.

Iris shivered as she gingerly moved her frozen limbs. She wondered if she’d ever feel warm again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the absence, I just have a really hectic school/work life. Your reviews the past few months have kept me planning and plotting this story and editing this chapter reminded me of how much I love this complicated story so thank you so much for your kind words and motivation, I'm sorry if I've disappointed you!
> 
> I know how it's going to end and I hate unfinished works so I know I'll complete this, just bear with me as I work it out.
> 
> next chapter will have the aftermath of the battle and some high school westallen...


	5. Chapter 5

“The security in this place really sucks,” Iris couldn’t help, but remark as she walked into the main room of the former S.T.A.R. labs.

While Caitlin had kept her past under lock and key for most of their working relationship, Iris still knew that she could be found in the dilapidated building after their more botched jobs. Her behavior always reminded Iris of a wounded animal in her worst times, preferring isolation when it came to licking her wounds and snapping at anyone brave enough to approach them.

Iris usually preferred to be non-confrontational when it came to problems in her life, she found that things either had a habit of fixing themselves over time or she stopped caring about them if she ignored it long enough. The only problem with this approach was the fact that her problems usually involved people who she didn’t care about cutting out of her life and Caitlin was firmly not in that group.

In fact, if she was the kind of person who could have a best friend, who could be trusted to be honest about both her lives with at least one person in her life, then Caitlin would be the closest thing she had to one. The fact that Caitlin threatened her life almost daily and was only joking about it around sixty percent of the time said more about her than it did about their friendship.

She found the ice wielder in the same chair she normally sat in while they planned bank heists, a loop of the particle accelerator explosion playing on the monitors in front of her. Her attempt at humor had barely registered a reaction.

“Caitlin, it wasn’t your fault.”

Her words were heavy as she watched Caitlin shift in her seat, her frozen eyes still staring at the horrific images in front of her, the videos thankfully on mute this time. The last time Caitlin had gotten in a mood like this, Iris had heard the screams of Central City in her dreams for months. 

“The diamond’s in the bag by the door,” Caitlin finally broke her silence, “the Flash, he… he was so angry and sloppy, I actually got away with it still in my hand.” 

Iris froze at the words. She had thought the diamond was still in the rubble of the museum, that this was another failed heist. She could see the small rucksack next to the entrance she had just walked in, so unassuming she had walked straight past it. Her greed fought with her innate empathy for a minute, the urge to run to the diamond overrun by her worry for the still figure in front of her. Just as she opened her mouth to make some celebratory remark, anything to break through the palpable tension still in the air, Caitlin started speaking again. 

“You can take the diamond and go, consider us even.” 

Iris froze.

“No. No, you can’t do this.”

Caitlin didn’t move, her eyes still staring at the monitors ahead of her, “You don’t know what it’s like to be a real villain, Iris.”

Her voice was cold and condescending, the barbed words made to hurt, to scar, “You only play at it. You live a normal life, with normal family and friends who can actually stand the sight of you, and then when it’s convenient, you put on your mask and you go have fun.” 

There was a tinny quality to her voice now, “I don’t have that choice. I look like this, I live like this, and I’ll die like this. I’m a villain,” she paused, the room silent, “I was made to be alone, I don’t know why I even thought…”

Her words died out.

Iris felt her frustration mount, the words having their intended effect and leaving her raw, “Caitlin,” she wavered, her voice breaking,  “You didn’t ask to be made like this. You didn’t build that particle accelerator to make yourself into some super-powered being for glory or to hurt people. You’re a victim of circumstance and your powers are not you. Even if,” her breath caught in her throat as she came upon the idea that she had doggedly been ignoring since she woke up, raw and dazed on that rooftop, “... even if I had died yesterday, I wouldn’t have blamed you, Caitlin. Just like I don’t blame you now. _Please_.”

Iris could blame a lot of people for a lot of things and even metahumans didn’t get a free pass for their problems just because of the powers that manifested in them. Some people were bad even before they had the power or abilities to manifest their evil.

But Caitlin hadn’t been one of those people.

Her words echoed in the silence, the seconds dragging as she waited for a reaction. Iris keenly felt that desperate little part of her, the piece firmly lodged beneath her breastbone, the one that ached with fear in moments like these. Fear that she was standing by and watching relationships disintegrate around her, fear that she was going to be abandoned.

She moved to leave, her throat dry and her resolve firm to come again later, when Caitlin would be more responsive and when she was strong enough not to cry trying to reach her.

The diamond was one of the largest in the world, but the bag felt like it contained a weight heavier than the world, a weight that threatened to drag her down with it. A soft whisper stopped her exit, the words bitter and ugly.

“You wouldn’t have been able to blame me, if you had died, Iris. It’s up to the people left behind to shoulder that burden.”

Iris looked back, her eyes softening as she took in the static figure that still sat in front of the monitors. Caitlon’s posture was perfect and upright, the minute control she held over her muscles painting a sadder image to her than if she had been slumped over and sobbing over the controls.

 

—

 

The Kaliinar diamond was perfect. It was grand and cut perfectly, the dim light that came in between the blinds of her window still managing to reflect off of it constantly. It was probably the most exquisite jewel she had ever seen.

And it looked completely out of place in her bedroom. 

By now, she would normally have already sold it on the black market. She had a few trusted sources of income, people she could get the diamond to quickly and forget all about it, the bank accounts of her favorite charities full and her conscience clean. She could cash in the other half of the millions and put them all in a bag then go throw them at Caitlin’s head, try to knock some sense in her.

But she hadn’t done anything. _She couldn’t._

Every time she went to even touch the stupid thing, she would be reminded of Caitlin’s frosted skin, of the Flash’s worried eyes staring down at her, the light touch of a steady hand at her back on top of a cold rooftop. And she would falter. 

The diamond sat where it had tumbled out of the bag she’d thrown on her dresser. Iris could see the dust metaphorically collecting around it, could see all the wasted effort she put into finally acquiring it and for what? She wasn’t any happier than she was before and people were no better off than they were before.

She shifted on her bed, changing her position for the first time in hours as she continued to stare at the useless thing in front of her. A thing of value reduced to a shiny rock because she couldn’t bring herself to sell it. Because for once in her life, she couldn’t bring herself to ignore all the hurt she had caused in her misguided actions for justice or valor or whatever it was that got her to don that skin tight leather every few months.

Maybe she was just an adrenaline junkie, a kleptomaniac with too many skills for her own good. Maybe she was cut from the same cloth as her mother. A woman with self destructive tendencies and a frantic need for escapism. Maybe it was in her blood, something she could never escape until it finally forced her into a dark corner that made her stop.

Iris remembered how hard it was for her mother to get clean, just how often she relapsed. But she managed it. She thought of the mother that was still in Gotham City, the one who woke up with a purpose every morning even as her health continued to decline. A woman that went from being held hostage at the side of a needle to counseling young addicts in shelters.

The one who managed to be there for Wally and countless other kids, if not for her, in the end.

She groaned as she fell back on her bed. It would get harder and harder to sell it the longer she waited and it had already been a week now. She wondered if Caitlin knew she hadn’t gone through with it, yet. If one of their contacts in the black market had hounded her for information about just who had the missing diamond now. 

She wondered if the Flash knew.

 

—

 

_Iris could hear Wally and her mother giggling in the other room, their hushed voices getting louder the closer she got to her doorway. Her hand stilled as she prepared to close her door, she could hear her mother’s attempts at reading ‘The Tortoise and the Hare’, could hear Wally’s excitement as he kept interrupting his favorite story to jump on his bed, yelling at their mother for a race._

_Her mother had been sober for almost a whole month now. There weren’t any signs of her relapsing, but there never usually was._

_When Francine was at her best, she was attentive and kind. Iris didn’t have to wonder why someone like her father would fall in love with someone as damaged as her mother when she was like that. Not even a cop could resist her mother at her best._

_But at her worst_ _—_  

_At her worst she was an unresponsive body, another person in a tragic history of neglect and abuse. At her worst, she was delusional and lost._

_Iris would almost prefer it if she was at least mean, if she was someone so starkly different from her sober mother that she could differentiate them, see them as two different people. But Francine high was still her mother and Iris could never forget that. Sometimes, she couldn't forgive that._  

 _She left her door open, going back to her vanity and attempting to comb through her hair to the sound of her little brother’s laughter. Her hair had gotten longer recently, her kinky curls finally growing past her collarbone._  

_Barry had even complimented her on her hair the last time they’d been to Joe’s house and she had adamantly spent the rest of their stay wearing her hair up. It made Iris’ skin itch when he smiled at her like that. Sometimes it felt like anger, but Iris had long given up on being angry at Barry. She would never admit it to his face, would snark at him and tease him with Wally until Barry finally gave up and walked out of the room muttering under his breath, she would sooner die than even say it loud… but he was probably the only person in this world she could trust to take care of Wally (to be there, always be there) outside of herself._

_A knock at her open door brought her out of her thoughts, the comb forgotten in her hand. Her mother stood in the open doorway with her arms tightly crossed against her chest and a small smile on her face. Her shoulders were hunched forward as they always were around Iris and it made her seem much smaller than she was._

_Iris swallowed and waited._

_“You know,” Francine started towards her, her hands reaching for the comb Iris still held tightly in her hands, “I was hoping you’d be a little older before I’d catch you making a face like that.”_

_Iris fidgeted as her mother began to comb the bottom of her hair, slowly working her way up._

_“A face like what?”_

_Francine stilled for a moment and raised her head, meeting Iris’ eyes in the mirror._

_“Like you’re hopelessly in love and absolutely terrified of it.”_

_Iris could see her eyes widen, her face heating up and her nose scrunching._

_“Mom! Ew!”_

_Her mother’s shoulder shook with laughter as Iris attempted to defend herself, to try to explain to her mother just how wrong she was, but her incoherent noises of protest were lost to the sounds of Wally giving up his pretence of sleep and running into her room screaming that Iris wasn’t allowed to fall in love and leave them. Her mother only laughed harder at that, the comb in her hand accidentally pulling at Iris’s scalp._

_The pain was sharp, but Iris couldn’t bring herself to complain for fear of bursting the safe little bubble they’d created in her room. She’d just have to tell her mother how wrong she was another day._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear I've had the first part of this chapter written since July and I just could not get past it. I was still hesitating to publish until now, but I'm really excited for the next two chapters so I'm just going to bite the bullet and do it haha.
> 
> Sorry for the long wait, I'm a really busy college student irl so I can't promise faster uploads, but I can promise this will be complete some day. Thank you for all your feedback during the wait, it really did help keep me motivated!
> 
> next chapter will have Wally and Iris banter, an actual interaction with Joe, and a party...


	6. Chapter 6

She still hadn’t sold the diamond.

In the month since the subjectively successful heist, she had gone through her daily life in a fog. When she sat at her desk, she would catch herself spacing out, hands poised over the keyboard in perfect typing position; her thoughts on the incriminating evidence that she couldn’t make herself get rid of, her breath caught in apprehension as she typed report after report on the smaller crimes that plagued Central City. Every time she went to court to get the sentencing for the crime stories— every time she walked into that domed justice building, its ceilings high and its expectations of her even higher— she could feel the pressure of her crimes resting in her chest.

It had never been like this before.

Before… _before_ , she could justify all of her actions. Her world was morally grey, her actions even greyer and everything was done for a reason that she could be proud of. Her jobs were either quick or painstakingly planned out and if there was even a chance of it getting messy, she would abandon them. Her ability to weigh the risk and reward of every situation was one of her most valuable assets, something she took pride in when it came to both of her jobs. And it was an ability that she’d lost.

Iris didn’t know how to live her life so spontaneously, to jump without any care or any thought of whether or not something would be there to break her fall. She was cautious, maybe not in things that didn’t matter to her as much like the random jobs she had in college, but for important things like her family, her freedom, and her feelings ( _those messy, terrible feelings_ ), she walked on a tightrope of constant decisions. One small misstep, one small slip, and she’d be broken. She knew that. She’d always known that.

She’d forgotten it.

That last heist was meant to be her last one, the one she could retire happily on. Selling a diamond like that would have been enough to make a real difference, something that would have calmed the demons in her soul that begged for her to make this cruel world a kinder place, a better place for the child she used to be.

And maybe it was what she’d always wanted. To be free of the Black Cat persona and to finally put her time and energy into understanding just who Iris West was. Maybe she would have time to repair her relationship with her father, to visit her mother more often in Gotham, to make friends who weren’t also supervillains, and to finally tell Barry that she…

Well.

She still hadn’t sold the diamond.

“Iris!”

Startled, Iris looked up to see Wally frantically waving his hand in front of her face. The other patrons of Jitters were looking their way, some with concern, but most with annoyance at having their work interrupted. Iris could feel herself blush as she turned back to Wally, the concern in his eyes making her throat close up.

Wally was never supposed to be the concerned one.

“Are you doing okay? I haven’t really seen you in a while, I mean, I heard from Barry that you were still coming to crime scenes, but even he was concerned when you igno—”

“Barry’s concerned?”

Wally stopped at her interruption, his incredulous expression speaking for him.

“So not the point I’m trying to make right now,” he sighed before continuing, “Iris, something happened, I know it did.”

Iris could see the concern in his eyes again, but he ignored her instinctive attempt at deflecting by continuing, “I also know the Kaliinar diamond’s gone missing. And that it hasn’t been sold, yet.”

Now the silence was deafening. Iris looked away to the side, ignoring the pleading in her brother’s eyes. This wasn’t a conversation she was ever going to have with him, the less Wally knew of the things she’d done for them, the better it would be for him ( _but especially for her, she heard a small part of her insist_ ).

She heard him sigh again, a bone tired declaration that she had never thought her little brother could make before. She found herself speaking before she could stop, “I’m just… tired,” and as she said it, she could feel just how true it really was. Her limbs ached whenever the temperature dropped, something she was scared would follow her through life, but even more than that, she felt a hollowness in her very soul. She would think of Caitlin, still holed up in S.T.A.R. Labs and the little she could ever do for her. She would think of the Flash and of how he saved her when it didn’t make any sense, and how she wanted to thank him, just this one time, but that there would be no way to unless she pulled another crime. And she would think about just how tired she was at that very thought.

Wally was quiet as he waited for her to continue, his hand reaching out halfway to rest on the table. Her little brother never pushed too far, despite his outgoing demeanor, he was one of the most careful people she knew. Especially, when it came to her. 

Iris let out a laugh, before sliding her hand over his.

“I won’t be tired for ever, though, so stop worrying, okay?”

Iris could see the skepticism that Wally kept to himself, but he smiled quickly at her before changing the subject.

“So, the city is holding a gala as an apology for the missing diamond, I think they’re hoping to raise some money to give to the very angry British heiress that used to own it. The whole police force is attending, probably as a reminder for how badly we failed,” he chuckled when Iris hid a smirk inside her coffee cup, “and I was wondering if…”

Iris quickly caught on, “You know she has a boyfriend, right?”

Wally let out a long whine, “But Iris, Linda and I—!”

“No Wally, you know I draw the line at homewrecking, especially when it comes to the people I work with.”

She carefully ignored his muttered, “Yeah, but grand larceny is just a-okay, huh?”, and checked her phone for any possible crime updates.

“Fine,” Wally sighed as he pushed his coffee away from him, “Then will you do me the _honor_ of going to the gala with me? It’s a required event and I’m going to die of boredom if I have to walk around schmoozing people with Joe the whole time.”

Iris found her nose scrunching at the thought of such a party, but found herself acquiescing to her little brother’s pleas. He had way too much power over her and he knew it, the little bastard.

She nodded, “It’ll probably be a good story opportunity, too. I’m still trying to get Mason to let me write about more than just the small crimes of the week. He mentioned I should start writing a Flash sightings blog for the website and I almost quit right there.”

“That would be hilarious, you don’t even like him! I could see it now,” Wally held his arms out in imitation of a fictional journalist who had just found his headline, “Red weirdo found speeding down Ocean Avenue, most likely showing off for the bikini clad populace of our sacred town. What would we do without such a savior, this journalist certainly doesn’t know.”

Iris choked on her laugh, the absurd images in her mind playing like a movie reel. She looked up to see Wally smiling at her and felt herself calm down. Sometimes she was so focused on doing things for herself and by herself, that she forgot about the amazing people she had waiting in her corner. 

“You know, Linda was complaining recently about how annoying her boyfriend is when she beats him at bowling. She looks like she may dump him sooner rather than later,” Iris exaggerated a little for her brother’s sake.

Wally threw a fist in the air, “Yes! I don’t know what kind of jerk would get annoyed at that, I would thank her for the opportunity to lose to such a goddess.”

“Oh Wally, you’re too young for her, I mean she’s my age!” Iris laughed, already seeing the rejection coming for her little brother. It wouldn’t be the first one he’d gotten since Iris started working at CCPN.

“Well, you’ll have to excuse me, not all of us find our soulmates at the tender age of eleven.”

“Wally!”

His laughter carried around the store as he dodged the napkin she threw at his head and this time when the patrons looked their way, Iris found herself ignoring them.

 

—

 

_Iris smiled as she adjusted Wally’s bowtie. Francine stood to the side, her hands clasped around a small, disposable camera and the largest smile Iris had ever seen on her face._

_“Okay, that’s enough, my bowtie can’t get any straighter than that, Iris!”_

_She rolled her eyes as she went to stand by her mother, giving her little (but not really so little anymore) brother a quick glance over. He was in middle school and this would be his first Valentine’s social, a small little party that would be held in his school’s gym, chaperoned by reluctant teachers and full of awkward pre-pubescent kids who only just stopped believing in cooties._

_Her mother sighed at her side, her resting on Iris’ shoulder, “Our little man is all grown up, now.”_

_“Mom!”_

_Iris laughed, loud and hard, at the beet red flush of Wally’s skin. She was still smiling as her mother moved to get her coat. Francine had recently started working with a local youth shelter and Wally’s date for the night was a young girl who currently resided there after being found on a patrol. She felt her heart warm at the thought of her little brother, so quick to forgive and even quicker to love. Considering her terrible track record, it was a good thing that at least one of them was such a romantic._

_“Mom, no more photos, you’re going to run out of film before we even get to the shelter!”_  

_Francine laughed, “Well, I can’t help it! At least one of my kids ended up a normal kid and I should get to treasure this as much as I can.”_

_Iris rolled her eyes._  

_“I am a perfectly normal kid, I just prefer my own company to other people’s.”_

_She could see her mother and Wally’s good natured mocking of her in her peripheral vision and ignored them. It was better that they thought she was a regular, angsty teenage girl than to have them really consider why she isolated herself the way she did._

_She didn’t want them to feel guilt for her actions._

_Iris could still remember her first Valentine’s social, the one that Dave McIntire had asked her to and that she had said no to. Iris knew that she couldn’t leave her mother, the one who struggled with relapsing every day, alone for that night. She especially couldn’t leave Wally alone to witness it when the inevitable happened._  

_The next day when she went to school, Dave had ignored her and Iris didn’t feel nearly as relieved as she thought she would at being left alone._

 

—

 

Iris had lost Wally the moment she’d walked into the gala. One second he was at her side and the next, he had wandered over to the bar where he was currently talking to a pretty girl that was laughing a lot harder at his jokes than anyone really should.

She could feel herself get annoyed at her brother’s typical play of her. He wasn’t nearly as worried about the gala as he was at getting her out of her apartment for a night and while his concern was touching, his abandonment was not.

The hotel ballroom was full of smartly dressed society people, the art of mingling practically instilled in them since the day they were born and Iris felt more out of place than she normally would in this situation. She stood by the door, considering whether or not she could make a run for it in these heels, when she heard her name being called through the crowd. If it was Eddie or her father, she was going to kill Wally. 

“Iris!”

Well, she’d always wanted to be an only child, anyway.

She could feel her mouth strain into a smile, her normal bravado lost when it came to conversation with Joe. The fights they would have when she was a child— when her anger was still this all encompassing heat that made her lash out at him randomly, when his own frustration would color his own tone as he defended himself against whatever small action made her angry that time— all of them unresolved and hanging between them year after year, even as they learned to be more civil for Wally’s sake. They had acted so civil for so long now, polite smiles and even more polite conversations, that Iris had no idea how they could ever mend the space between them.

One of them would have to be brave enough to cut into the long scarred wounds between them, to have them bleed ( _and to hurt_ ) anew. One of them had to be brave enough to re-introduce their anger towards each other and Iris…

“Hey, Dad. It’s been awhile, how have you been?”

Iris was so tired of it all now.

Joe stopped in front of her, his hands moving up awkwardly for a moment before they dropped back to his side. His own face looked pained for a moment before he cleared his throat, looking to the side where waiters were passing by with refreshments.

Iris’ attention was caught by this. She calculated just how many glasses of champagne she would have to imbibe before this interaction would be easy and determined that her variables would be too inconsistent. In her emotionally stressed mood, she may accidentally bypass “relaxed” and go straight to airing out all her problems with the world. That was something to save for when there wasn’t a ballroom full of people to arrest her.

“Iris?”

She looked back, realizing that Joe must have spoken. A moment’s hesitation and Joe must have realized she hadn’t heard him when he started speaking again.

“I just wanted to know how you’ve been. I noticed you’ve been more distracted at the past couple of crime scenes and I haven’t seen as many of your articles in the CCPN lately.”

A woman three feet away let out a long, shrill laugh in the silence that had followed. It wasn’t a surprise for Joe to notice her distraction the past few weeks, Iris had been too obvious and too distraught, especially that first week. But for him to notice that the amount of articles she wrote had also decreased, something she normally had to fight to write more of and that she’d been too preoccupied to attempt lately, was a surprise for her.

She didn’t know what to say to such an open amount of concern from him, something that was far and beyond their normal topics.

“I…” she stopped to clear her throat, the scratchiness obvious in her voice, “I’ve just been a little tired lately. That’s why I’ve been so distracted and I haven’t been writing… as many articles, I guess.” 

Joe didn’t look convinced, if anything, his concern seemed heightened by her word choice. Perhaps, she’d have to start answering people’s concerns differently, but “tired” was the only way she could summarize the bone deep numbness that she’d felt the past month. The lack of motivation, for crimes or for her writing; the lack of empathy when she’d see a homeless kid on the street, something that would anger her beyond measure a few weeks ago, that would instill a new need to steal more, to do more. How often she would hold that damned diamond in her hand, staring into the perfectly cut ridges and being reminded of the frost that grew on her skin at Caitlin’s touch. The cold would build in her as she thought of the rooftop, of the raw anger in the Flash’s voice, and she was suddenly frozen, a slowly thawing statue in her own home. 

Iris could already feel her anxiety rising, this conversation was taking too long and she just wanted to leave, she wasn’t ready for this right now. She was never ready for these things.

“You shouldn’t work yourself so hard, when was the last time you took a vacation?”

The same lady laughed again and Iris was sorely tempted to throw one of the small cucumber sandwiches in her direction. Maybe she would choke on it and finally shut up.

“Iris—”

“I don’t know, okay! When was the last time you took one, Joe?”

She had been too loud, the people around them had gone quiet, staring at the spectacle of her and her anger. The same shrill lady was now looking at her, appalled at her volume.  

Her father laughed, a fake assurance that nothing was _really_ wrong with them and everyone looked away again.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to be so rude right now,” but she couldn’t finish her apology. Joe looked almost grateful at her outburst, the concern even more apparent in his eyes and Iris had the terrifying thought that he had been waiting for this break in her countenance. He wanted to talk, to really talk, and he wanted to do it now.

She spoke again before he could try, “Wally and I are having dinner together at my apartment on Sunday. He wanted me to invite you, if you’re free that day?”

“Of course, that would be wonderful,” he ignored her phrasing and her habit of making it Wally’s wish if she spent time with him, “I never get to see you kids as much as I want to, anyway.”

They exchanged a few more pleasantries before Joe was summoned away, a pretty District Attorney leading him by the arm towards a group of people that wanted to argue metahuman rights with the lead detective that usually solved those cases. Normally, Iris would be intrigued, metahuman rights being a topic that she loved to argue extensively, already having written multiple op-eds on it for the CCPN.  

But Iris could tell that he hadn’t dropped their previous conversation, that all she had done was stall him for a few more days.

Fantastic.

 

—

 

“Iris,” Barry exclaimed as he rushed towards her, almost knocking a man’s champagne glass over in his haste.

Iris felt herself smiling at his clumsiness, something he had never really gotten over in all the years she’d known him, “Barry.”

She could tell her easy smile shocked him and made a mental note to be more engaging in the next few days. The amount of concern people were throwing at her was really getting on her nerves.

He stood before her, smiling for a moment longer than he probably meant to before the man next to him cleared his throat, “Oh! Iris, this is my friend Cisco Ramon. I don’t think you guys have met yet, but he’s a mechanical engineer. He’s actually helped build a lot of the tech that I work with.”

He smirked at this and Iris was distracted for a moment before the man next to him cleared his throat again, “Oh, uh, it’s nice to meet you, Cisco.”

Cisco shook his head at them, his bun heroically staying put, “It’s my pleasure, actually. Although, I’ve heard about you so much that it practically feels like I already know you. Barry never shuts up about you. Ever.”

Iris could feel herself starting to blush, carefully avoiding looking at Barry.

“Uh, that’s… nice to hear?” 

Cisco let out a laugh at her flustered response, their mutual embarrassment obviously amusing him and she felt her irritation rise before she could stop herself, “It’s just too bad I can’t say the same. I don’t know if I’ve ever heard about you before.”

That was a bold faced lie, but it had its desired effect. Cisco narrowed his eyes, his best friend status having been threatened sufficiently and Iris felt a feeling of déjà vu. She had the strangest thought that this wasn’t the first time she’d argued with him, even though she’d never met him before this moment.

An arm flew in between them, Barry nervously trying to defuse an argument that was exponentially growing in a way that didn’t even make any sense. If she could just figure out why she was so inherently annoyed by Cisco right now…

“I didn’t come over to hear you guys argue about who’s my real best friend, and by the way it’s both of you,” Iris kept her glare focused on Cisco, but she felt herself smile again at the little reminder that Barry valued her just as much as she valued him, “I actually came over to ask you to dance, Iris.”

Iris finally looked away from the scrunched up expression on Cisco’s face, something that probably happened when he was thinking too hard for a comeback, and looked up at Barry in surprise. He caught the look she threw him, suddenly realizing exactly what he’d just said and began to stammer an explanation.

“Wait, what I meant, well actually that’s exactly what I meant, but—”

A noise came from behind them, a shriek that Iris found herself attributing to the same grating woman as before, before the gala erupted into chaos. 

The same arm that separated her and Cisco suddenly found itself around her waist as she was pushed to the ground. An earth-shattering explosion vibrated through the marble floor and a flash of light streaked past them.

Was that— no, no it couldn’t be the color was different, it was—

“Iris! Iris, are you okay?” 

She looked up, the streak of light already lost in the rushing crowd as she found Barry again. His features were contorted, his breath coming in heavy and it was only then that she realized he was still holding onto her. She could detect a faint tremble in his arms, like it was taking everything in him not to move away from her. She looked past him to see Wally at the door, holding it open for people to evacuate. Cisco was nowhere to be found, having disappeared in the commotion.

“Barry,” her voice was a whisper, the breath still knocked out of her, “that was… did you see him? Was that the man in yellow? No, it had to be him, he was so fast, but it was him! I—”

He looked away, the resolve in his eyes hardening. Iris had never seen him like this before and for a second it felt like there was a stranger in her arms.

“You have to get out of here, okay?” He looked at her once to make sure she complied, his relief at her acquiescence palpable. 

He moved away and Iris felt herself catch his arm as it slipped away from her waist, “Wait!”

She was almost surprised he stopped, the tension in his frame was held so taut, she felt like if she let go of him right now, he would disappear. The words died in her mouth, her plea for him not to do anything stupid, to just stay away dissipating. This was his mother’s killer and there was nothing she could say now that could stop him.

She could only hope the Flash came, _for once in her life_ , she hoped that he finally made use of all that speed and got here before Barry could do anything to harm himself.

“Please, just be careful.”

He was still looking away as he nodded, his eyes following something she couldn’t see. She felt no relief, but she let go of him all the same, watching as he ran into the same crowd of people. Her thoughts were quiet, the pandemonium of her surroundings leaving her calm.

She had never noticed just how tall Barry could carry himself before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For someone who updates as often as I do (a.k.a. never), you would think I'd stop ending chapters in cliffhangers. I blame Charles Dickens for this habit.
> 
> next chapter will have some life threatening situations and an Iris and the Flash interaction finally...


End file.
